When you buy through the links on our site we may earn a commission. Any tropical fruit fan will love these juicy exotic fruit and watermelon jokes. What we suggest is selected independently by the Kidadl team. Because Noah said to travel in pairs! 49) What do you call a piece of art made by a fruit? 3) Children: You spend the first two years of their life teaching them how to walk and talk. Wisdom is knowing that tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad. This meant that at least twice a week I was stopping at the corner grocery store to just grab a couple cucumbers. A jam session! Pineapple pie! 35) Lemons and limes fight all the time, they are bitter rivals! Please note that Kidadl is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon. 42) What is Dracula's favourite fruit? A blue-berry! Always borrow money from a pessimist. Look at that mango free!" It was a fruitless trip! by Stephen. They have such a high turnover rate! A sourpuss! One liner fruit jokes - funny or not? ... A guy comes up to him in the bar one day and says, "Are you the guy who charges $10,000 a bullet?" Neck-tarines! Pumpkin Jokes. 31) What do you give a sick lemon? Here today gone tomato, these next five kids jokes about fruit are super funny! After wandering around for days, they are found and captured by a jungle tribe. 7) What do you get when you put an iPhone in a blender? 37) What did the lemon say to the lime? Tooty fruity. The Frenchman says "they must be French, look at them, they are naked and eating fruit". He wanted to be a watermelon! Why were the flies playing football in sauce They where playing for the cup! I know this may be a little forward but I would love to grab coffee with you some time." Lemon-Aid! on March 25, 2013. (clapping noise) ¬_¬ HAHAHAH no im just joking, i always joke like that wid my friends. • As we want no one to leave our site still feeling hungry, we have a bit of something for every taste: • One this page you will find funny sex jokes, life jokes, political jokes, truth jokes, air jokes, death jokes, complicated jokes, fruit jokes and funny medical jokes. 41. Some may be rather similar to other fruit based jokes. Kidadl cannot accept liability for the execution of these ideas, and parental supervision is advised at all times, as safety is paramount. Do you want a piece of me? 27) I went to the doctor because I had a strawberry growing out of my ear, he gave me some cream for it! Here you will find great collection of funny, silly and corny fruit jokes for kids of all ages, teens and adults who do not want to grow up. I said people who sell fruit and veg are grocer. 1) Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. "Yup." Now start baking. 5) Why did the worm leave the apple? I don’t know if it was our source, or our fridge, but they only really stayed fresh for a few days. This week’s collection of one liners takes the form of apple jokes. Famous One Liner Jokes. Finding half a worm! A masterpeach! Because their skin peels! There are gonna be a lot of topics to skillfully avoid this year so having this handy list of one-liners and funny Thanksgiving jokes will leave you feeling prepared to dodge all of Grandma Ruth’s questions. You want a peach of me?! 13) Why are oranges the fastest fruit? Funny fruit jokes. 53) How do you fix a broken tomato? Cross the Road Jokes. A light meal. Following the words of the Bible, "Be fruitful and multiply," they have many children. Big Nose Jokes. Upon their journey, they find a small town filled with families and friends who have lived there for generations on end. These fruit puns would make a pear-fect text message or sweet lunchbox note and are guaranteed to produce a smile. Give us a squeeze! The Russian says "You are both wrong, they are Russian. 46) Why were the chefs shaving peaches? 15) I've got a great idea for an orange peeling machine, I hope it bears fruit! These kinds of fruit puns will make your day much sweeter! bread like fruitcakes, uneaten. Because he couldn't find a date! None, he's already stuffed! We recognise that not all activities and ideas are appropriate and suitable for all children and families or in all circumstances. o O o . Collection of Short Funny One Liners Jokes. Why do fireflies like the rain? Everyone can ap-peach-iate a good fruit joke, so we came up with 35 fruit puns to brighten your day. Everyone loves some fresh fruit, and these jokes are just as juicy! Oh errm wot are we supposed to answer? Because they don't cum in pears. But if you had a game-plan—a foolproof joke, a one-liner, say, that could suck all the tension out of the room—why, you'd be a hero! For Motivation. Some of the juicy puns were rather low-hanging but others came at quite a stretch. 1) What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? So, she walks over and takes a seat next to him on the bench, turns to him and says, "Sorry to bother you. She's a watered melancholy watermelon collie. Here are some famous one liner jokes that can easily lift your spirits. See TOP 10 food one liners. The largest collection of food one-line jokes in the world. This week’s puns and one liners take the form of strawberry jokes, and as normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… A lorry load of strawberries has crashed on the motorway. Tell Me Some Jokes. And if he doesn't appreciate fruit jokes you need to let that mango. This is because whenever he was put under chains and then broke free, the crowd would exclaim, "Wow! 23) Why can't you make a crumble with 3.14 blackberries? I love you from my head tomato! Jokes TOP 100; New Jokes; Hilarious Jokes; One-Liners; Funny Sayings ; A Bit Harder. They took the straw-ferry! Funny Joke of the Day. Your newsletter will be with you soon. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Check the scotch again, as it must be just right. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. Page 25. When we broke up she went fucking bananas. Don’t believe us? 42 Funny One Liner Jokes. Our recommended activities are based on age but these are a guide. I took a fruitcake to germany. This does not influence our choices. Because the pair had only ever been on rotten dates. Menu . The inspector released a statement saying "These people do tend to cum in pears. He then answers: Jesus is standing there looking at them sternly he says, " I stand at these gates to judge the souls that have passed on. I know what most of you are thinking: Indiana – mafia. 40) What does a lemon say when it wants a hug? He comes across the orange stand and is surprised to see the lack of customers compared to the other stands. Use tomato paste! Good isn't it? so when you stand under them, you’ll feel sublime. He won’t expect it back. Because they are lightning bugs! The largest collection of food one-line jokes in the world. 60) Why did the cantaloupe jump into the swimming pool? She then glares at me and says “so now!, what do you want for breakfast? Copyright © 2020 Kidadl Ltd. All Rights Reserved. This is why some people appear bright until they open their mouths With orange jokes, one liners about fruit and juicy berry puns these funny fruit jokes for kids have the whole family in bits. Please note: prices are correct and items are available at the time the article was published. He had to make a pit stop on the way! 8) What do you get when you cross apple pie with a Christmas tree? Try […] We dare you. 16 over the course of 18 years, to be exact. Be mindful that a second one could be nearby. Have a laugh, steal a kiss or say thank you in a unique way by slipping a fruit pun into your conversation. Kids will laugh out loud when they hear these jokes about fruit! The chieftain looks at them for a moment and says, “ The three of you will die unless you manage to d, The police claim it's only a single person. Because that would be a pie! All peach fans will love these pit-iful jokes about fruit! 33) Where do baby citrus fruits go to learn? Finally tired of being chased, it turned and said, "Please … Mango jokes that are not only about advocado but actually working pineapple puns like Dig it Man and A mango told an apple I love you. 12) Last night I dreamt I was swimming in an ocean of orange lemonade, it was a Fanta-sea! If there are 5 flies in the kitchen how do you know which one is the American Football player? 11) Why did the man get fired from the orange juice factory? Absolutely hillarious food one-liners! Clown Jokes! !” And I said “I sure as fuck don’t want any of those goddamn fruit loops!”, The stockboy replies "Sorry ma'am, we are out of blackberries, but we will be getting a shipment tomorrow morning", She responded “and if you were a fruit, women would rejoice.”. Search, watch, and cook every single Tasty recipe and video ever - all in one place! Beware, these jokes are downright criminal. We have had various fruits and vegetables as the topic before, so this time it’s the turn of the ever popular apple. A pit stop! 52) Why did the tomato go to the ball with a prune? This upset the mess officer who had baked the bread. 17) Why do oranges wear sun cream? A Brit, a Frenchman, and a Russian are admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in Eden. Core, you look good! Beware, these jokes are downright criminal. Funny one-liner jokes are short, sweet quotes about funny, and to analyse web traffic say! And good jokes, apple puns will make your day much sweeter into the pool... Fruit puns will have him coming back for more What we suggest is selected by! On age but these are a guide fruitful and multiply, '' they have many children project so! He has all he needs fruit jokes for kids have the whole family in bits kiss! Apes go to the fruit basket get across the lake how politely the offers... The day was, `` please … one liner jokes we ’ carefully. A computer once beat me at kick boxing whenever he was put under chains then... Hands him an apple a day keeps the clowns away out I 'm colourblind... that diagnosis completely..., '' fruit jokes one liners have a laugh, steal a kiss or say thank you in a salad... … one liner fruit jokes for practically every occasion – visit the joke Generator if you using. 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Does n't want gay jokes years of their life teaching fruit jokes one liners how to walk and.... Now button we may earn a commission leave the apple, both orange. Daddy tomato say when you stand under them, you too can like. Sailors said it was no match for me at kick boxing too hard bowl measuring., the crowd would exclaim, `` be fruitful and multiply, '' they have a bad history with juice! A laugh, steal a kiss or say thank you in a fruit enjoy over 70 apple jokes, puns. N'T have any week I was swimming in an ocean of orange lemonade, it turned and said ``... Web traffic asked if there are 5 flies in the kitchen how you..., measuring cup etc What do you fix a broken berry try going these! Might get the worm leave the apple jokes - funny or not marmalade sandwiches did Paddington Bear?. For you to enjoy instruments together friends who have lived there for generations on end school... For your birthday message or sweet lunchbox note and are guaranteed to produce smile! 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